GreatSvenster's My Thoughts as I watch Clannad: After Story

Episode 1
Yes yes yes, the music is very nice to scenery looks beautiful yeah yeah, I get it I get it it's very pretty now get on with it.

Let's hope this OP is better...

...yes...yes it is.

I am please, After Story. PROCEED

-3 minutes in

"You lit my heart like a fire...RIKE ZA FIREBULL"

Oh Akio...your new name is Akibro.

Episode: The End of Summer

Oh no, there's gonna be a time lo-

NO SVEN BAD NO MORE MOHS REFERENCES!

Okay, honestly, I gotta comment on something with this series.

I really like this...like, the whole idea of it. The whole, "It's gonna show the after high school life of the characters" aspect to it. I think that's really god damn school and I wish more High School Slice of Lifes did that.

-5 minutes in

"I don't have confidence in sports."

Is that moe? I'm not sure.

Tomoyo, you've haven't kicked Blondie's ass in a good 10 episodes, nice to see it again after the long painful drought.

-6 minutes in

OH MAN YES! The electrician! I was hoping he'd come back.

For the love of god Blondie if you say "PLAY FREE BIRD" I swear to god- oh okay, he didn't.

Mr. Electrician beat up Blondie too. This is 2/2 on awesomeness, it's a shame you're not a main character.

-7 minutes in

Aw, he's not gonna play the baseball game, I was hoping I'd see more of him.

YAY HE CHANGED HIS MIND! ...Though I should complain because it was basically...

T: Please play in our baseball game. E: No. I'm really busy. T: Please? E: Okay.

...Am I right? That was kinda, really rushed.

-8 minutes in

Blondie: Join our baseball team! Misae: No. Tomoyo: Please? Misae: Okay.

... Why do they even have these scenes are they gonna do them one buy one for every god damn player?

...Wait Mei's joining too? Mie doesn't look very...athletic...not at all. She's too adorable.

There's a pattern with these sports episodes...I never pay attention before they have the game, so I never know why they're randomly playing a game, so it loses all meaning to me. I should start paying attention more.

-9 minutes in

lol the loser has to eat his wife's bread. heh heh..something sexual.

-11 minutes in

My sister's boyfriend walks in, sees Blondie and he's like, "That guy looks like Joey from YuGiOh."

I laughed.

-12 minutes in

God I really hope Nagisa or someone else cries at any point during this game just so I can say "THERE'S NO CRYING IN BASEBALL!"

Damn, this episode's taking so long because I drunkenly ate an entire bag of marshmallows last night and I'm paying the price for that now >_>

NAGISA'S PITCHING? BWWUUUUHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH? WHAT A CRAZY TURN OF EVENTS HERP DERP

-13 minutes

HERPA DERPY DOO DA GENIUS IS USING THE SCIENCE IN BASEBALL HERP Yeah, I still don't buy the whole "Kotomi is a genius" thing.

-14 minutes in

"YATTA!"

...but at least she's moe.

So she's not entirely terrible. And she makes me laugh. Still, stop it with the genius angle pleeeeease Clannad? It's lame.

BLONDIE YOU HAVE BROUGHT MUCH SHAME TO THIS BASEBALL TEAM

Now would be the good time for hari kiri. DO IT FOR HONOR!

-15 minutes in

"Oh you totally cost us a run we so desperately needed but it's totally cool."

Baseball is not this passive. She'll never make it to the major leagues with that coaching.

-16 minutes in

It's hard to hit like a girl, Tomoyo?

...Not for me >_>

"That's the way I like it!"

...That was f***ing cheesy, Tomoyo. Bad girl. Yeah it's nitpicking, and I tried ignoring it, but I paused in my thought for that, and I was like, "...What?"

-17 minutes in

YES! Mr. Electrician! I was wondering where you were at!

-18 minutes in

This is like the entire plot of Bad News Bears taking place in the span of one game.

...Except they still ended up losing-...wait, they lost at the end of Bad News Bears right? I forget, I've haven't seen that movie in forever.

...Wait, the game's not over yet?

-19 minutes in

Oh wow Mr. Electrician, you're really pretentious...in the funny way like Russel Brand's character in Forgetting Sarah Marshall...kind of...I hope ._.

-21 minutes in

...Wait, what happened with the game? The hell, this is like a Lucky Star joke, but instead of a setup but no punchline, this is a subplot but no resolution. Wait am I watching the cutscenes from Metroid Other M? Badum tish.

...Oh okay, I guess it was just a weird, random intermission.

-22 minutes in

...Wait..was that transition symbolic? Is the hidden world connected to the present day real world somehow? Or were they just being artsy?

Episode 2

 * Clannad After Story 2*

Danbo! ...actually, I'm getting kinda tired of these segments.

-5 minutes in

Blondie, you're a slacker. Do something with your life...and leave this anime. Please.

Oh dear lord, they're gonna pretend Blondie actually has a female companion that's willing to deal with his stupid s***. I see where this is going. Actually, that's a lie, I don't. I just know it's gonna end badly. Has lying about something ever turned out fine in fiction?

"You're actually not that ugly."

Well that's a backhanded compliment if I ever saw one.

-6 minutes in

He's going after Ryou. I know how this will turn out, Kyou's gonna beat his ass, it's gonna hilHARIOUS and I'm gonna sigh.

-7 minutes in

Offfff course.

You know, it's funny De called me a drunk bastard, since yeah...I'm a little drunk.

"Why don't we try asking Kyou?"

And the award for dumbest question ever goes to...BLONDIE!

-9 minutes in

You know...Tomoyo...dating Blondie...would please me. As long as it was an abusive relationship. Tomoyo would obviously have the d*** in that relationship.

...Blondie, god I hate you.

-11 minutes in

Pluses going to Tomoyo from all directions. Blondie got burned and beat up. Good.

-12 minutes in

...Kotomi? Really? Ugh, -1 Kotomi.

Then she pulled out the violin...eh, not enough to make me stop shaking my head.

-13 minutes in

Anyone who hurts Blondie is a-ok in my book. This new guy made a good first impression on me.

And he kinda looks like that one guy from Ao no Exorcist.

-15 minutes in

...Blondie you're being exceptionally annoying and creepy today.

-16 minutes in

...Sanae? This is hot. Go on.

Also, I can't believe this entire episode is just finding Blondie a fake girlfriend. This episode is terrible.

..hold on

Wait, this is the worst idea ever. Mei knows Sanae. Of course she'd want to meet his "girlfriend". Blondie is stupid...obviously. I have no idea why I'm surprised.

-18 minutes in

Wow, Sanae, you have faith in Blondie? ...Terrible. Terrible terrible terrible.

"Knowing [Akio], he might go into a jealous rage and turn Sunohara into mincemeat."

I vote we tell Akio. Anyone else?

"Watching him is pissing me off."

Well, at least me and Toyota are on the same page.

-19 minutes in

I wish I could teleport into this anime and just slap Blondie. Just smack him around a bit.

-21 minutes in

Sanae as a schoolgirl...really...really...hot.

...This episode sucked. I'm going to bed.

Episode 3

 * Clannad: AS 3*

What's with everyone using Isogai as a fake name? Then again, Sanae is so hot right now so I don't care.

"I feel sorry for you!"

I'd say the same thing, Mei. You're a good sister.

You know, I like this OP and all...but the lack of Fuuko makes me sad. I really hope Fuuko shows up again. Everything always NEEDS MOAR FUUKO

-3 minutes in

I'm confused...what's so bad about this place? Is it like, a maid cafe or something like that? Or a strip club?

OMFG MEI YOU ARE SO ADORABLE

http://i51.tinypic.com/2q8qywp.png

I JUST WANNA PINCH THOSE CHEEKS

GET IN MY MOUTH MEI-CHAN! NOW!

-4 minutes in

"Who would wanna go to an arcade right off the bat?"

They're going to an arc- yep.

-5 minutes in

Blondie is like, the worst date. I hope Sanae fake breaks up with him.

....Blondie you are just the worst god damn person.

-6 minutes in

Aw, Sanae you're so sweet.

Blondie: Nah, f*** that, I wanna bulls*** some more, let those kids find their home themselves.

Honestly, really wouldn't doubt it if he said that at this point.

OMFG HE DID SAY THAT! Seriously, as soon as I unpaused after saying that, he f***ing said it. God damn Blondie you are the scum between my f***ing toes. HOW IS THIS GUY LIKED? I hate this man with every inch of my being.

You are the worst conceivable person, Blondie. You've got termites in your soul.

-7 minutes in

"It was OUR date.

Oh my f***ing God. You selfish little f***ing p****. I hate you. I only found you annoying before but god damn, I just hate you now.

I am honestly horrified.

-8 minutes in

No Blondie. You can't just be all carefree and nonchalant after that s*** you pulled last night. Get the f*** out of my line of vision.

CAN YOU STOP TALKING ABOUT TOILET SEAT COVERS? JESUS CHRIST!

-9 minutes in

I'd buy a Blondie toilet seat cover. I'd purposely miss the bowl too.

"If I marry Sanae, and you marry Nagisa, that'd make us brothers."

Uh, no that'd make you his...stepfather in law. I think. Oh wait, Blondie still thinks Sanae is Nagisa's sister right?

-11 minutes in

How does Mei not just kick Blondie's ass? She probably could, to be COMPLETELY honest.

-12 minutes in

Blondie just keeps getting worse and worse and worse. He won't even go after his sister. What a worthless scumbag.

-13 minutes in

I just wanna give Mei a hug. All she wants is her brother to give a s***, but he turned into a little dick. Also, oh wow, past Blondie wasn't blonde at all :O

-14 minutes in

"No! We never thought of him [as hopeless]!"

I did. The quicker you realize it the better.

-15 minutes in

I've grown to really like Tomoya. Like, he's really smooth and charming, unlike most main characters in romance animes(Koyuki from BECK, the guy from Bakuman, the guy from Amagami SS), and you can see why he would get the girl.

-16 minutes in

When Mei called Tomoya onii-chan and he kinda did that gagging taken back motion, I laughed...because really, that was way too cute.

-17 minutes in

Ryou dropped her ice cream in shock...oh, it's the little things that make me love this anime.

"There's a reason for this!"

"Ah! Tomoya! What's that thing sticking up in your pants!"

MEI IS BEING TOO GOD DAMN ADORABLE! She needs to stop. That, or just get in my mouth already.

-18 minutes in

Oh dear lord, Mei's gonna be eating ice cream. If this never gets posted, it means I died from moe shock.

HOW CAN YOU SAY NO TO THAT FACE? JUST BUY IT FOR HER!

omfg

omfg

this is way too god damn cute. Mei's exceeding Fuuko levels at this moment.

OMFG SHE HAS SOME ON HER FACE

uuuuuuuuuuuuuuu~

...This is terrible. I'm never like this.

-20 minutes in

"Mei's boyfriend turns out to be me."

I...I don't know what to think about this.

Okay, I was thinking, okay maybe Blondie will stick up for her sister and turn things around...but nope. God Blondie there are no words to describe you. Besides terrible.

-22 minutes in

I feel really bad for Mei. :(

Episode 4

 * After Story 4*

Okay, usually before the OP, this series gives us a little introduction to the episode, like a lot of anime do. This intro, however, consisted of Tomoya looking to the left, then Tomoya looking to the right, then him twirling his pen. And that's it. Hm..

Have you ever noticed how in High School anime, every student looks the exact same, and has the same color hair, except for the main characters? It's like, if you ever went to high school with someone with crazy purple hair, they were the main characters. Just keep that in mind.

So, the characters have to convince Blondie to play soccer, so that he can get in touch with his inner good brother, so he can be reunited emotionally with his younger sister?

This episode is going to be stupid. God not only is Blondie bad, but the episodes in his arc are all bad.

-4 minutes in

Oh wow, these soccer players are dicks. Then again, I forget, it's high school still. Even anime high school has bullies.

-6 minutes in

They're visiting stoney-chan? What are they gonna do a charm that turns soccer players into nice guys?

Ever see that College Humor video "Internet Distractions"? Yeah that's why this review's taking so long >_>

-7 minutes in

At least Yukine's good at being really reassuring. She's a wise sage full of wisdom.

-8 minutes in

Oh god, Tomoya and Blondie in a confrontation. I really hope he hits him.

-9 minutes in

Kotomi, shut up, they SHOULD fight.

KICK 'IS ASS, TOMOYA!

-11 minutes in

Where is this arc going? This arc is terrible.

-13 minutes in

Aww, Mei's adorable even when she's all dirty...she just looks like a cutie little homeless orphan from 1800s England.

God is everyone who plays soccer a dick? That explains Blondie.

Is Blondie worth all this? I vote no.

-15 minutes in

...They made Mei-chan cry. Bastards. She's adorable when she's crying still.

-16 minutes in

BBBBBBBBBBBBBBWUUUUUUUUHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHT?

Blondie coming in from behind...and totally redeeming himself? Out of f***ing nowhere?

I'm...I'm...wow.

-17 minutes in

Eh, I would've rather had it if you beat Blondie's ass when he wasn't in the midst of his only cool moment in the entire series.

-19 minutes in

Things I learned from Clannad #2: Violence is the answer.

-21 minutes in

"And we were always together...especially pissing together. We needed to include that."

Decent end to a horrible arc.

Episode 5
Fuuko's here? Wait, is this a flashback?

oh

I'm watching Clannad 5 >_>

Erm.

Cool, another Danbo sequence. I kinda hoped that once we were done the whole play thing, we'd be done with Danbo.

"It's fun isn't it?"

"FUN? DOES NOT COMPUTE SEARCH INQUIRY ZERO RESULTS FUN IS A NONSEQUITOR, FUN IS AN ILLOGICAL CONCLUSION DESTROY ALL HUMANS DESTROY DESTROY DESTROY"

-4 minutes in

Big Swing! Damn, Blue-Mary's transgressed from the King of Fighters tournament to the Virtua Fighter tournament.

My favorite character's Wolf too. And by favorite character I mean the only character that wasn't a lame, generic looking duckass.

virtua fighter sux

Oh hey, what's the character selection? Well you can be the kung fu guy, the beard guy, the old guy, the monk guy, the Chinese girl, the sensei-looking guy, the hot blonde, the American, the ninja... No, that's not their archetypes, that's just their names.

Oh yeah, they also got Rey Mysterio.

-5 minutes in

Heh, Blondie tried to sell off Misae's cat.

Blondie, why would you do through all that trouble to eat cat when you can just order some Chinese? Snap.

Heh, that whole thing with the "do your clothes smell like catnip?" reminded me of how whenever I go over someone who has cats's house after work, they're always all over me because I work with crab, clams and shrimp all day >_>

-8 minutes in

"DIVINE RETRIBUTION!"

Clannad fightan game. Make it.

-9 minutes in

...That was an odd way to put it, Tomoya. Weird...odd way to compliment someone, but s***, I'll take it.

I have this odd feeling that when they dub Clannad, Blondie's gonna have a really obnoxious voice...like Jacuzzi from Bacanno obnoxious.

-10 minutes in

"This brings me back to my youthful days."

Isn't Misae like, 23? I'd consider that "youthful" I don't know about you. Damn, making me feel old. What's with early 20s anime characters always considering themselves old?

-11 minutes in

...So...what was the point of that scene? Is it symbolic? Is it trying to say the cat has hypnotic powers? I'm lost.

...Who the f*** are these two ducks? Wait, is that Misae? ...Oh, this is a flashback.

"Don't I look familar?"

Yeah you kinda look like...Renton mixed with...Bianca from Pokemon Black.

-15 minutes in

This sucks. There's nothing to make fun of, it's just boring and stupid.

-16 minutes in

I never got why marriage in anime was so...like, not a big decision. Like, it's always like, "Oh I have a crush on him, therefore, I'm in love with him, therefore I want to get married to him." I've honestly never looked at a girl in school and decided "Hey, it's my goal to marry this girl." Is this normal Japanese culture or something? It's just...weird.

Overanalyzing this series is helping me understand the science behind fictional media. Which is why whenever something different comes around I quickly jump on it.

-20 minutes in

Dude, that's a beat thing to put on somebody. Like, having the responsibility to tell someone something like the guy you like doesn't like you is a really hard thing to do.

..Oh wow...that episode was...really sad.